"Keep your friends close but your enemies closer." This line, made famous by Michael Corleone in The Godfather Part II, provides a keen insight for improving our art and our lives.
Too often we wage war with the parts of ourselves we do not like. We want to conquer these perceived weaknesses. Blow them to smithereens, wipe them off the face of our earth.
But what if instead of trying to eradicate our flaws, we made friends with them. Accepted them and invited them in. Embraced them, held them close. Just like meeting a new acquaintance, we'll begin to learn about these so-called inadequacies. Soon we'll begin to see the positive aspects of our enemy. In time—as our love and acceptance continues—our foe will soften. It will show its other side. After all, even our most feared enemies are not entirely evil.
One of the enemies of a creative life is fear. We think, "If I wasn't so scared, I'd go for what I want." So what if instead of trying to crush your fears, you invite your fear in for a long talk? Sit with it. Ask it why it's there. Ask it what it is trying to do for you. You might be surprised to find that fear—and a host of other "enemies"—actually has you best interest at heart. It wants to protect you. It doesn't want to see you suffer or get hurt.
Listen to it. Understand its intention. Thank it for caring. Then walk fear to the door and lovingly wave goodbye as it walks away. Sure, it will stop by for a visit from time to time, but instead of begrudging its arrival, you'll greet it like an old friend.
Remember, as long as we make war with ourselves, it is impossible to feel entirely at peace. When we are in unrest, our thinking is muddied and we cut ourselves off from the flow of inspiration that guides our work.
Yes, there are some flaws and weaknesses that truly are hindrances. These should be dealt with appropriately. But with some enemies, the best way to get rid of one is to make him a friend.
To your good fortune!
Friday, February 27, 2015
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Is Your Creative House Divided?
In what is now known as the House Divided Speech, Abraham Lincoln stated that, "A house divided against itself cannot stand." Although he was referring to the conflict surrounding slavery in the United States at that time, I think his statement holds true today in our personal and creative lives.
Think of yourself as a house. If you are not unified internally, or are having competing thoughts, habits, or priorities, your "house"—and your creative endeavors—will crumble.
The solution is to get clear about what you really truly want. Create a detailed vision for your life. Get laser focused about what you will and won't do moving forward.
Say yes to the dreams in your heart.
And then say no to all distractions and detractors.
Creativity flourishes when our external actions reflect an internal alignment. Unify your house and stand firm.
Think of yourself as a house. If you are not unified internally, or are having competing thoughts, habits, or priorities, your "house"—and your creative endeavors—will crumble.
The solution is to get clear about what you really truly want. Create a detailed vision for your life. Get laser focused about what you will and won't do moving forward.
Say yes to the dreams in your heart.
And then say no to all distractions and detractors.
Creativity flourishes when our external actions reflect an internal alignment. Unify your house and stand firm.
Friday, February 20, 2015
Fortune Friday: "Nothing in the world is accomplished without passion."
In my younger—and more flexible—teenage years, I enjoyed participating in the martial arts. One Saturday morning I found myself on the dojo floor awaiting my turn in the sparring circle.
I sat mesmerized as I watched a scrappy, five-foot-tall, hundred pound, Hispanic, green belt named Jesse stand toe-to-toe with one of the senior black belts.
As it was, I was sitting next to my teacher. Clearly seeing the look of awe on my face, he was prepared when I asked him what is now an obvious question.
"Sensei, how does he do it?"
His reply was a revelation. He simply said, "All things being equal, the outcome of a fight usually comes down to who wants it more."
My teacher then went on to explain that in most encounters fighters tend to rely on a handful of well-practiced moves. And that raw desire (and the willingness to take a hit), not mere technical ability, was often the determining factor. This reminds me of that famous quote by Bruce Lee when he said, "I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times."
My teachers words stuck with me. Probably why now, 30-years later, I can recall them with such clarity. And while passion certainly has its place in the practice of martial arts and sports, it also has incredible usefulness in day-to-day life.
Pretty much everything we want in life can be attained if we want it bad enough. And if there is something we claim to want, but have not yet achieved, the simple truth is we probably don't want it as bad as we say. Which is to say, we haven't taken the necessary actions.
Or at the very least, we are not willing to sacrifice—or admit to—what we think it will cost in order to attain it.
And that's okay too. The important thing is to stop lying to yourself. Want what you want, don't want what you don't want. Either is acceptable. Just be honest.
To your good fortune!
I sat mesmerized as I watched a scrappy, five-foot-tall, hundred pound, Hispanic, green belt named Jesse stand toe-to-toe with one of the senior black belts.
As it was, I was sitting next to my teacher. Clearly seeing the look of awe on my face, he was prepared when I asked him what is now an obvious question.
"Sensei, how does he do it?"
His reply was a revelation. He simply said, "All things being equal, the outcome of a fight usually comes down to who wants it more."
My teacher then went on to explain that in most encounters fighters tend to rely on a handful of well-practiced moves. And that raw desire (and the willingness to take a hit), not mere technical ability, was often the determining factor. This reminds me of that famous quote by Bruce Lee when he said, "I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times."
My teachers words stuck with me. Probably why now, 30-years later, I can recall them with such clarity. And while passion certainly has its place in the practice of martial arts and sports, it also has incredible usefulness in day-to-day life.
Pretty much everything we want in life can be attained if we want it bad enough. And if there is something we claim to want, but have not yet achieved, the simple truth is we probably don't want it as bad as we say. Which is to say, we haven't taken the necessary actions.
Or at the very least, we are not willing to sacrifice—or admit to—what we think it will cost in order to attain it.
And that's okay too. The important thing is to stop lying to yourself. Want what you want, don't want what you don't want. Either is acceptable. Just be honest.
To your good fortune!
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Someday Is A Day Of The Weak
Recently, an acquaintance posted an inspirational meme on social media. The quote—of which many are quite familiar—said, "Someday is not a day of the week." And the meaning is clear: quit putting off those things you claim are important to you.
But in a brilliant reframe, personal and business coach Steve Hardison replied to the post with, "Someday is a day of the WEAK."
This struck a profound chord within me. There is great power in simple truth.
In every exchange—be it our careers or relationships or personal goals—we have the choice to act from a position of power or a position of weakness. We can be an Owner or play the part of Victim. The decision is ours.
Given the choice, why would we ever purposefully opt for the option that doesn't serve us?
Friday, February 13, 2015
Fortune Friday: "Your nurturing instincts will expand to include many people."
The greatest gift we can ever give to another person is a piece of our selves. This gift can take many forms, including our time, our talents, our ideas, or even our resources.
As I grow older, I find myself concerned with my own affairs less and less. My urge for consumption—particularly material possessions—has decreased overall. I'm simply less enthralled by stuff these days. I am more content and grateful for what I already have.
I now find myself compelled to 'spread the love' and 'share the wealth' and regularly pass along freelance design projects to fellow colleagues—especially when a project doesn't light me up creatively. I love recommending people and businesses. Being 'social glue' has its own rewards, more often internal than external. And I am fine with that.
I also find myself being much more generous with my compliments. It feels great to share credit or speak highly of someone. It just feels better to build people up than to tear them down. Not that I was ever intentionally cruel or hurtful, just disinterested and preoccupied.
I never understood the heart's capacity for expansion until the birth of my children. Just when I thought I wasn't capable of loving more, I suddenly discovered a new level of feeling. And from what I understand, these nurturing instincts expand ever more when a person becomes a grandparent.
Hopefully in the future, I will get to experience that next level of love. Until then, I will seek to expand my nurturing extincts to include many people.
To your good fortune!
As I grow older, I find myself concerned with my own affairs less and less. My urge for consumption—particularly material possessions—has decreased overall. I'm simply less enthralled by stuff these days. I am more content and grateful for what I already have.
I now find myself compelled to 'spread the love' and 'share the wealth' and regularly pass along freelance design projects to fellow colleagues—especially when a project doesn't light me up creatively. I love recommending people and businesses. Being 'social glue' has its own rewards, more often internal than external. And I am fine with that.
I also find myself being much more generous with my compliments. It feels great to share credit or speak highly of someone. It just feels better to build people up than to tear them down. Not that I was ever intentionally cruel or hurtful, just disinterested and preoccupied.
I never understood the heart's capacity for expansion until the birth of my children. Just when I thought I wasn't capable of loving more, I suddenly discovered a new level of feeling. And from what I understand, these nurturing instincts expand ever more when a person becomes a grandparent.
Hopefully in the future, I will get to experience that next level of love. Until then, I will seek to expand my nurturing extincts to include many people.
To your good fortune!
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
We Need Your Light
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| Original photo by Dustin Scarpitti. Quote by me. |
A common trait among creatives and would-be entrepreneurs is a feeling of unworthiness. We look at our sketches or novel outline or business idea and think, "What's the point. I can't make a difference. It's all been done before."
We think we have nothing worth saying or at the very least nothing new to add that hasn't already been done before.
And to a degree, this is true.
But that is not what is important. What is important is casting more light on the world, even if our light closely resembles that of someone else.
We all go through a learning curve and we are all at different points on our pathway through life. In the beginning it is okay to lean on the shoulders of others until we are able to stand on our own. It is perfectly fine to reconfigure, regurgitate, and repurpose what you see and hear—so long as you give proper credit where credit is due—until you find your voice.
In college, my design professors encouraged us to copy and mimic our artistic heroes. To grow and learn from them until our style—our personal artistic voice—emerged.
You unique voice can be a light to the world. Our world can feel like a dark, cruel, and unrelenting place sometimes. If we focus on this darkness, it will weigh us down, weaken our resolve to follow our dreams, and, eventually, crush our souls.
Don't let that happen. Don't give in to the noise and the voices that would tell you that what you do won't matter. To paraphrase a line from The Help, you are kind, you are smart, you are important.
We need your art. We need your voice. We need your innovative product and life-changing services. We need (and value) your unique perspective.
We need your light. Shine bright.
Friday, February 6, 2015
Fortune Friday: "A friend asks only for your time not your money."
Time is a finite resource. No matter who we are, we all have the same 24-hours in a day. Rich, poor, famous, obscure, smart, stupid, black, white—it doesn't matter.
Money, on the other hand, is a comparatively infinite resource—although we tend to ascribe it more value that is really has. We see it as all-powerful and difficult to obtain. In western culture, we put money on a pedestal. Certainly, money is a useful tool for day-to-day living and expediting progress, but it is not the be-all, end-all.
By this comparison, our time is actually more valuable than our money. We can always earn more money, but none of us can create more minutes in a day.
When someone, then, asks for our time, they are asking of us our most precious commodity. How we spend our time and who we spend it with should not be taken lightly or treated casually.
When you give a friend "only" your time, you are giving them a gift greater than any sum of mere money.
Your time is priceless. Use it well.
To your good fortune!
Money, on the other hand, is a comparatively infinite resource—although we tend to ascribe it more value that is really has. We see it as all-powerful and difficult to obtain. In western culture, we put money on a pedestal. Certainly, money is a useful tool for day-to-day living and expediting progress, but it is not the be-all, end-all.
By this comparison, our time is actually more valuable than our money. We can always earn more money, but none of us can create more minutes in a day.
When someone, then, asks for our time, they are asking of us our most precious commodity. How we spend our time and who we spend it with should not be taken lightly or treated casually.
When you give a friend "only" your time, you are giving them a gift greater than any sum of mere money.
Your time is priceless. Use it well.
To your good fortune!
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
How To Improve Your Value In The Marketplace
As a followup to my earlier article about confusing worth with value, I wanted to share a simple formula I learned from supercoach Michael Neill on how to analyze—and thereby increase—your value in the marketplace.
He called it Scope, Scale, and Scarcity.
The formula is easy. Determine where, on a scale of 1 to 10, you rate in each category. Then multiply those numbers times each other. The higher the product, the more likely you are to be well paid.
But first we need to define the terms.
SCOPE refers to the relative impact you have on an individual or industry. Low impact, like flipping burgers, rates a lower score. High impact, like brain surgery—literally a life and death situation—rates a higher score.
SCALE relates to the quantity of people you affect or reach. Fewer people, lower score. Many people, higher score.
SCARCITY describes relative level of uniqueness of what you do. Common, pedestrian, or ubiquitous jobs rate low. Unique or one-of-a-kind jobs rate high.
Here are some examples:
1. Fast Food Worker
Scope: 1 - impacts people very little
Scale: 3 - helps a fair amount of people each day
Scarcity: 1 - pretty much anyone can do this job
Overall score: 3
2. Brain Surgeon
Scope: 10 - high personal impact; literally saves lives
Scale: 1 - directly helps a small number of people
Scarcity: 8 - not a common job, but not uncommon either
Overall score: 80
3. LeBron James, NBA basketball superstar
Scope: 2 - provides entertainment, but usually not (although possible) life-altering
Scale: 10 - potentially reaching millions of people
Scarcity 10 - There is only one LeBron James
Overall Score: 200
Using the formula, we can see in the examples why some people are well paid and others are not. Note, these overall scores are not a directly-correlating, dollar-for-dollar scale. They merely indicate the relative reason why one person may be compensated more (or less) than another.
If you want to increase your earnings, look for ways to improve your scope, scale, or scarcity. If you want to launch your income into the stratosphere, upgrade all three.
He called it Scope, Scale, and Scarcity.
The formula is easy. Determine where, on a scale of 1 to 10, you rate in each category. Then multiply those numbers times each other. The higher the product, the more likely you are to be well paid.
But first we need to define the terms.
SCOPE refers to the relative impact you have on an individual or industry. Low impact, like flipping burgers, rates a lower score. High impact, like brain surgery—literally a life and death situation—rates a higher score.
SCALE relates to the quantity of people you affect or reach. Fewer people, lower score. Many people, higher score.
SCARCITY describes relative level of uniqueness of what you do. Common, pedestrian, or ubiquitous jobs rate low. Unique or one-of-a-kind jobs rate high.
Here are some examples:
1. Fast Food Worker
Scope: 1 - impacts people very little
Scale: 3 - helps a fair amount of people each day
Scarcity: 1 - pretty much anyone can do this job
Overall score: 3
2. Brain Surgeon
Scope: 10 - high personal impact; literally saves lives
Scale: 1 - directly helps a small number of people
Scarcity: 8 - not a common job, but not uncommon either
Overall score: 80
3. LeBron James, NBA basketball superstar
Scope: 2 - provides entertainment, but usually not (although possible) life-altering
Scale: 10 - potentially reaching millions of people
Scarcity 10 - There is only one LeBron James
Overall Score: 200
Using the formula, we can see in the examples why some people are well paid and others are not. Note, these overall scores are not a directly-correlating, dollar-for-dollar scale. They merely indicate the relative reason why one person may be compensated more (or less) than another.
If you want to increase your earnings, look for ways to improve your scope, scale, or scarcity. If you want to launch your income into the stratosphere, upgrade all three.
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